This weekend we decided to take to the outdoors for some fresh air and trail therapy, much like we usually do. It was exactly what the doctor ordered to relieve any stresses, and gear up for another week of quarantining at home. These are very strange times, and although we are grateful for the family time, sometimes the weight of what is going on around us is a difficult pill to swallow. For our family, spending time outdoors is an instant anxiety buster, and we’re happy to share a little glimpse of that in this video with you!
This summer we set out on a whirlwind two week trip to Portugal. It was Mia’s first time traveling by plane, and her first time overseas or out of Canada for the most part! We arrived in Lisbon early in the morning and hit the ground running. We drove over 3000 kms in two weeks and saw the whole country top to bottom, making sure to grab a galão (the greatest kind of latte) and treats at every stop!
The trip was packed with site-seeing, family time, and birthday’s (mine, Luch’s and Mike’s)! Needless to say, there was never a time when we didn’t have anything to see or do. We visited Óbidos, Pastéis de Belém, Praça do Commérico, Sintra, Palacio da Pena, Villa de Real Santo Antonio, Portimão, Praia da Rocha, many hot spots in Peniche including Berlengas, Cabo Carvoeiro and Baleal, and in northern Portugal Furadouro and Torreira, and the list goes on! Aside from these beautiful scenic locations, we also spent a lot of time in the small rural towns that Mike’s grandparents live in. We spent our time there eating, having late night chats, eating, having dance parties on the roof, walking to the bakery, did I say eating? Needless to say, we ate a ton of warm, fresh bread and baked goods, and I definitely wasn’t complaining.
Check out the video below for a little glimpse into our time in gorgeous Portugal!
A few nights ago was the first time I REALLY had to discipline my toddler, and if I am being totally honest, it made me feel like utter garbage.
We got home late from a family outing, and Mia was up way passed her bedtime…and while we’re on the road to Truthville, Mia barely has a “bedtime” as it is. Every night we seem to get her to bed and asleep at a vastly different time than the last, especially over the last few weeks. The days leading up to this particular evening have been a Game of Thrones Season 8 style, torch of Kings Landing, where Mia is Dany, the Mad Queen, and Mike and I are the innocent villagers, army-less and being burned to death below. Don’t even get me started on poor Emma (our patient, patient dog). She is basically a war prisoner, forced to watch the villagers burn and cry. Okay, okay – I am being dramatic, but seriously, every single night has been a total sleep fight, and these parents are on the losing team.
However, of all the bedtime battles we’ve encountered, this one was top notch. Mia screamed for over an hour straight. Blood curdling, wall shaking screams. We tried rocking her, giving her warm milk, singing softly to her, letting her watch her favourite videos, rubbing her back, cuddling her in our bed, asking her questions to distract her, or even just plain old letting her cry it out in her crib. After an hour of the most persistent performance by Mia Muffin herself, I snapped. I went back into her room for the third time and yelled. I yelled so loud that I even startled myself. Shockingly Mia responded well to my bellowing demands, and slowly sniffled herself to sleep in my arms while I let my own tears roll down right along with hers.
I rarely lose my cool with her, but a part of me makes me wonder if it’s because I am a fairly patient mom or because she is a good kid. She’s never been a big cryer, she’s never been too fussy about naps, and up until lately she’s been a pretty decent sleeper. Is it possible that she just hasn’t tested me like some other kids may have up until this point? Is there a chance I am actually not the best mom when it comes to handling the harder things because I’ve never really had to?
These questions and many others flew through my head as I paddled deeply through the weeds of mom guilt I was experiencing. Guilt about getting her home so late that she was utterly exhausted. Guilt that she was so overtired she could no longer control her emotions, and guilt that even though her fit of exhaustion was all my fault I still couldn’t manage to control my own fit, and keep calm for her sake.
Although I am not new to mom guilt, lately the notion of being a “bad mom” has popped into my head lately more times than I care to admit. In reality I know I am not a terrible mother, but why is it that I can feel like the biggest failure ever when it comes to motherhood moments so darn often?
The more I internally bullied myself, the more I started thinking about who I consider to be a good mom and why, and when I really broke it down, almost every parent I have encountered in my own life I would consider to be good; if not great. Are they all perfect? No (but is anyone?). Do they care about their children more than anything else on the planet? Yes. Without a shadow of a doubt, yes.
Once I was able to take a step back and realize that as long as I try my best to create a positive, nurturing, and loving environment for my daughter every day, I am a good mom. As long as I care about her and for her in the best ways I know how, I am a good mom. As long as I just try to eliminate the self-doubt that I have and just allow myself to enjoy motherhood with all its lumps and bumps, I am a good mom.
Parenting is known to be one of the greatest and most challenging gifts in life. Although I know this won’t be the last time I disappoint myself in choosing the less desirable course of action as a mother, I am going to always try and remember this moment and the lessons that it taught me about who I am as a person, and about who I hope to be as a parent.
If I can pass along any words of wisdom from one mama to the next, it would be to be gentle with yourself. Navigating through the deep, murky waters of being a parent can be tricky, and I can safely assume, only gets more muddied over the years. You’re learning at the same speed as every other parent, so try to give yourself as much grace as you would to the struggling mom next to you. Next time you’re sitting at home, internally beating yourself up over all the strange details mom’s beat themselves up over, give yourself a pat on the back instead. Congratulate yourself on showing up for yourself and your kids every day. You’re a great mom, so keep it up!
Swimming with a toddler can be tricky. We’ve been taking Mia swimming since she was 4 months old, and over time she’s become less and less fond of cold water. She loves the pool and lives for splashing around, but if the water temperature isn’t like her nightly bath then she’s not having it.
We are often hanging out on the St. Lawrence River in the summer or chilling lakeside at different cottages around Ontario and Quebec, so hopefully Mia grows out of her distaste for “refreshing” bodies of water. In the meantime, we’ve found that the PERFECT place to take Mia Muffin swimming is my grandma’s retirement home!
The staff are nice enough to let us go for family swims as long as my grandma is with us (usually just observing from a pool lounger), and Mia absolutely loves the extraaaa warm water. This salt water pool is essentially an extra large hot tub and it truly is the best. They pump the heat in the whole pool area and it seriously feels like you escaped to the tropics for a short while.
Recently we posted a family vlog on our YouTube channel about our adventures swimming at Nonna’s retirement home, and if you’d like to check it out, click the link below!
Taking advantage of the weekends to spend quality time with family is what it’s all about for this working mom! Although we often get tied up with activities and plans on the weekends, it’s so nice when we can totally slow down and enjoy our home all together.
We live in the country on a couple acres of land which, in truth, we do not get to enjoy as much as we would like given the craziness of the work week. However, when Saturday and Sunday come around, enjoying our yard in every season is our go to “plan”.
Check out our video below to catch a glimpse of a day in the life for us on a weekend at home!
About three weeks ago, Mike and I adventured out to Nevada to enjoy some time as a twosome, and when I say adventured, I really mean it! Three flights, 15 hours, and an intense road trip later we made it to Tahoe… Incline Village to be more specific. We started out with some rain in Reno, which turned into snow on Mount Rose Highway, which turned into a halted line of cars with the biggest downpour of wet snow I have ever seen. We waited in the lineup of vehicles, anxiously sitting through the booming rumble of dynamite set off to trigger “controlled” avalanches. Needless to say it was worth the nerves! We safely pulled up to our hotel, and it was a dreamy oasis filled with families anxious to hit the slopes. Take a peek at our video below to catch a glimpse of our time in the Sierra Nevada!
The winter months are long in Ottawa, and in our family we opt to get outside rather than hibernate through it. Snowshoeing is one of our favourite family activities, and we try to get out there and enjoy the snow as much as possible throughout these long months.
We are very lucky to live in an area with some beautiful trails, and on this day in particular we took advantage of them and the amazing winter sunshine. To catch a glimpse of what a snowshoeing afternoon looks like for us, click the link below! …and if you enjoy that video, be sure to like and subscribe to our channel!
A new year means a fresh start for a lot of people. I always get excited about the idea of turning a new leaf, and feeling like it’s the beginning of a new adventure. The start of a new calendar year offers people the excuse for no excuses, and gives a lot of people the motivation or momentum to start a new hobby, start working out, start eating healthier, etc. However, a new year doesn’t always offer people the ability to maintain that perspective and newfound motivation.
Mike and I purchased our home over two years ago now, and it has been a work in progress ever since. A lot of blood, sweat and tears went into this place, and will continue to forever. Everyone tells you that when you buy a house, the work never ends…and it’s true. However, the way I see it is that the more work you put into it, the more memories you make, the more proud you are to call your place home, and the more your house truly becomes a home.
Mike and I both work Monday to Friday, 9-5 (more or less). Like most people who work during those busy commuter hours, we spend a lot of the time out of the house, and away from our little one. Although we have always really cherished our weekend time with one another, now that we are both back to work full time since my maternity leave, the weekends are even more precious. Two weekends ago, we decided to take a day, and enjoy some much needed family time. Mike, Mia and I headed out first thing Saturday morning to Rockport, Ontario to embark on a full day cruise. The cruise headed to two different castles in the Thousand Islands with a healthy lunch in between visits. Since it was the last day for cruises for the season, our boat was not very full and we had loads of room to stretch out and enjoy.
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About me
Hi!
I'm Jessie, and welcome to Cool, Calm & Cozy!
This space is an outlet for me to connect with my creative side and keep long lasting memories with my family. Writing and making videos of our adventures together is a passion of mine, which I hope brings joy to my whole family presently and in the future!
Hope you enjoy Cool, Calm & Cozy, and thanks for following along!